Talk the talk — it’s critical in the early years
In the digital age, conversation is endangered, and it risks holding children back.
We all know the value of time spent between parent and child. But there’s ways you can make it even more powerful. It’s not in hugs or words of praise. It’s in the conversations you have with them. Indeed, your child’s future may depend on it.
As early as the kindergarten years, there’s a difference in children’s readiness for learning. Some of their capabilities at that age can be explained by genetics and economic factors. But much of their skill can be attributed to how much dialogue was provided to the child by their caregivers, and the quality of those conversations.
One critical study in the 90s showed that by the age of three years, some children might have heard 30 million fewer words than their peers. This word gap has huge implications on a child’s literacy skills and preparedness for schooling. Once that impediment is a factor, it is increasingly difficult for the child to catch up.
It’s not only the number of words heard by children that is important. Research increasingly shows critical elements of interactions, to enable children to reach their potential. Here are some ideas to make your interactions truly pop.
While it is beneficial for a child to hear conversations between adults, it appears that they gain the most benefit when actively included in the conversation. Having them hear discussions via the TV or between their parents is not as effective as speaking directly to your child. That’s not to say that all your conversations should be directed at them, but it is good to have them as the primary audience often.
Direct conversations are beneficial as the child learns the back-and-forth nature of interactions. Plenty of questions will keep the child engaged. Providing positive feedback after they speak, will keep them contributing, such as, ‘That sounds fun. You had a good time!’ Giving this reaction will role model the encouragement that they should provide when others speak.
Children often love stories parents and grandparents tell of what the child did when they were younger. But it appears that the action of recollection is also extremely important in developing a child’s skills in vocabulary and narration.
This is particularly true if caregivers ask the child to elaborate on elements of their story, rather than just go through the facts. So, when a child describes what happened at day-care that day, it is good for adults to ask the child more questions. Queries such as, ‘What did your teacher say then?’ or ‘How big was the rabbit?’ help a child to remember an event even better. This also helps them have better narrative skills, and understand that all good stories have a critical timeline of events.
Other important questions to ask include ones on the emotional reactions of the people in the experience. This is not only true of the child recounting a story. It’s good for parents reading books to children to take some time out and ask the child how the protagonist might be feeling or what they think is going to happen next, before you turn the page.
Parents can help use conversations as a means of encouraging a child’s interest in the world. For example, when walking around a museum, explain the artifacts in an enthusiastic way to encourage a child’s interest. Or eagerly explain to your child what is happening with the change of seasons, as you walk through the park.
In the act of truly preparing your child for the world, talk isn’t cheap. In fact, it might be the most valuable thing you can do.
Takeaway for parents
When talking to younger children, try these techniques.
· Before they can talk, endeavour to name the things they are looking at, so they make the connection.
· Stuck for something to say? Commentate on your actions. As you tidy the loungeroom, tell them the name of each item you pick up. Name the ingredients in your sandwich as you make it.
· Describe your child’s actions, such as the blocks they are picking up.
· Avoid babytalk and very simple sentences with toddlers. This will help them develop more complex language skills and vocabulary.
· Ask your child questions, particularly open questions, to have them answer more completely and practice longer responses.
